Through the Narrow Gate
Title: He Touched Me
by Deb Nelson
He Touched Me
Five years ago Jesus delivered me from my 23-year habit of
drugs. I had more than one drug of choice in my life, but the main one that
seemed to follow me through was pot.
I started smoking pot at the age
of 13 and after about the age of 15, I really don’t remember too many days
that I went without it. If I was unable to find it for a short period of
time because the town was “dry”, I would do something else to numb myself,
usually get drunk. Basically, for 23 years, I did some sort of mind altering,
mood altering substance everyday.
“And do not get drunk with wine, for
that is debauchery; but ever be filled and stimulated with the Holy Spirit.”
Ephesians 5:18 AMP
My life was messed up; I was in and out of relationships, marriages and
affairs. I used men and drugs to fill the space inside of me that only God
could fill. I was (as my Pastor would say) “worshipping Baal”. I tried
all kinds of self-improvement, I read books, listened to tapes and attended
workshops. I strived, I mean I REALLY STRIVED, I worked and worked and used
all the energy I had until I gave up. Then I would shame myself for failing
and get up the energy and try again. I was trying to change my character
traits, my behaviors, the circumstances of my life and my unhappiness. But
I was looking in all the wrong places. For more details see my testimony,
(Prodigal Daughter) at www.restforyoursoul.homestead.com.
“So kill (deaden, deprive of power) the evil desire lurking in your members
(those animal impulses and all that is earthly in you that is employed in
sin): sexual vice, impurity, sensual appetites, unholy desires, and all
greed and covetousness, for that is idolatry (deifying of self and other
created things instead of God).” Colossians 3:5 AMP
I’ve been a Christian since December of 1994, yet I didn’t quit drinking
and doing drugs until August 1996. I did quit using men though; I had made
the decision to be celibate. The reason for the celibacy was not for any
spiritual reason at first, it was because my ex-husband had been cheating
on me for over 3 years and I wanted to see if I had any STD’s (Sexually
Transmitted Disease).
“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in
a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image
from glory to glory just as by the Spirit of the Lord.” II Corinthians
3:18 NKJV
I had been praying God would help me to quit drugs, but then I would be
afraid and add to my prayer “but please don’t let me get busted!” God is
good, He delivered me and I wasn’t busted.
“Be anxious for nothing, but
in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests
be made known to God” Philippians 4:6
(Due to the length of this story it will be continued in my next article
entitled “Freeze Tag”)
© Deb Nelson 2001
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